The summer movie season has so far given us one sequel that finally arrived almost decades after its predecessor, “Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.” But there is another movie just released that was also decades in the making, and I am not sure if anyone outside of the Fangoria crowd is aware of it. The movie is “The Mother Of Tears,” and it is Dario Argento’s concluding chapter in his Three Mothers trilogy which started back in the 70’s with “Suspiria” (one of my all time favorite movies), and then went on to “Inferno” (which I have not yet seen) in the 80’s. The promise of a third mother film has dogged Argento for years and years, and it almost became as unlikely as the recent Indiana Jones. Now, that it has been released, it gives hope (maybe too much) to those who still wait for the next chapters in “The Evil Dead” series and “Phantasm.” To hell with “Hellraiser” and all its crappy direct to DVD movies!
The movie stars Dario’s daughter Asia as Sarah Mandy, an art student who works at the Museum of Ancient Art in Rome. One day, an urn is delivered to the museum, and a colleague of Sarah’s, Giselle, encourages her to open it up with her. Even in a Dario Argento film, you have characters doing something so stupid as unleashing a demonic power that has been dormant for ages. Of course, if they didn’t do this ignorant deed, then we would have no movie to watch, so I guess we should only argue about that so much. Anyway, this urn actually contains a tunic and other objects that belong to Mater Lacrimarum, the last of three powerful witches who have been spreading terror and death for centuries. But she is not just any ordinary witch, she is the most powerful (not to mention the most beautiful) of the bunch.
Once the urn is opened, as we have heard so many times before, all hell breaks loose. Demons come out and attack Giselle in brutal and beautiful Argento fashion as she is disemboweled and strangled to death. No one makes a death so gory as beautiful on film as Dario does, nobody. Soon after, Sarah is on the run as the third mother and her minions chase after her. At first, we think it is because she was witness to the unspeakable murder at the start of the film, but soon she finds that her mother (who had died at the hands of Mater Suspiriorum) was actually a powerful white witch. As a result, Sarah has inherited both psychic and supernatural powers that she can be used to defend herself and attack her enemies. As Rome succumbs to a wave of violence involving suicides, rapes, and murders, Sarah comes to find that only she can defeat the third mother, and she has to do it before the whole world goes insane (as if hasn’t already).
“The Mother Of Tears” is by no means a perfect film, and the fact it is from a director with a very strong body of work will go against it as would any other famous director like Scorsese or Spielberg. Some of the acting is overdone, the plot is almost impossible to describe (I had to go to IMDB and the film’s official website to make sure I knew what I was talking about), some of the effects are not very good, the script has plot holes and lapses in logic more often than not, and the end of the movie is rather anticlimactic to say the least. Now a lot of these flaws would sink any other movie, but then again, this is a Dario Argento film, and his films are usually filled with flaws like these. Even the best ones like “Suspiria” don’t exactly make a whole lot of sense. What matters is the look of the movie and the atmosphere of it, and Argento still proves to be a genius at giving his movies a look all their own.
“The Mother of Tears” is no “Suspiria,” but then again, it was really never meant to be. Like “Raiders Of The Lost Ark,” it was a one of a kind movie. On it’s own, “The Mother Of Tears” is a gloriously over the top horror/fantasy film that I had a ball of time watching. The look of the movie is orgasmic in its use of color and has an exhilaratingly creepy look that sucks you in the way an Argento movie should. Like I said, no one makes murder more beautiful than Dario does onscreen. The Fangoria crowd is gonna go nuts over this film as it has all the gore you could ever imagine a movie having. Disembowelments, beheadings, heads being bashed in, throat slashings in every other scene, rape (thankfully not shot the way it was in “Irreversible”), fights, nudity (mostly of the female kind), and A LOT of breasts. The Third Mother, like Catherine Trammel from “Basic Instinct,” does not believe in underwear. If that tunic had not been taken out of the urn, she may have gone thru this movie completely naked (not that I would have had a huge problem with that mind you).
After all these years, Dario still does an amazing job with color on the big screen. The color red is striking, and the use of green and blue makes certain locales appear more inviting than they should be. Seriously, it’s like looking like walking thru an art museum and not being able to take your eyes off even some hideous. You feel like you shouldn’t be looking at it, but you are still drawn to the poetry of brutality and violence in a way that nothing else does. Dario also pulls off some amazing shots here, and there is an amazing one as he follows Asia via Steadicam in an unbroken shot that lasts a good 5 minutes or so. He puts you in her shoes, and you are searching an apparently vacant house alongside Asia. It’s a brilliantly done sequence.
Asia herself is really good here, even when she is verbally espousing very clichéd dialogue. Regardless of what others may have said, she has always been a really good actress, and she is not afraid of going to the edge in some parts. This is not a role that plays off her sexuality or exploits it (as many other American films have like “XXX” among others). She gives a vulnerable heroine who we root and care for, and she makes sequences where she has to make herself seem invisible to those chasing her seem not so far-fetched or unbelievable. It goes without saying that Asia kicks ass in so many different ways.
Many have accused Dario Argento’s films of being misogynistic, and that’s complete bullshit. It is clear that he loves women, and they are more often not the heroes of the stories he writes and directs. Yes, women get hacked to pieces in the most beautiful ways possible in his films, but guess what? So do the men! Heck, one man gets his face bashed in by a woman, and I mean REALLY bashes his head in. Like John Carpenter did in his movie “Vampires,” Dario in the end proves that he is an equal opportunity abuser. Whereas American films these days tend to favor butchering the young and most attractive people available, he shows no age bias who ends up being sliced and diced. Dario even includes, in a very horrifying sequence, an infant. Had this movie been submitted to the MPAA (and I assume it wasn’t considering that it was released unrated), it almost certainly would have received an NC-17.
One of the t-shirts I got recently at a Fangoria Weekend of Horrors convention has the MPAA logo on it, and it said this underneath:
“Must Punish All Artists.”
There are other scenes that seem like homages to other horror films whether they intended to be or not. One scene with a woman carting a baby down on a bridge in Rome reminded me of Mrs. Baylock from “The Omen,” only this woman was not as protective of the young child (if only he were Damien). There are several other moments where very attractive witches prance around airports and train stations on their way to Rome to reunite with the Third Mother. They go around like annoyingly loud teenagers without a care in the world, having not yet discovered how cruel the world can really be. But of course, these witches already know this and they revel in it while Rome falls victim to rash acts of violence. There are moments when they stand and stare at others from a distance like zombified humans. They come off like all those who stared at the church where the vat of Satan is held in John Carpenter’s “Prince Of Darkness.” Whether or not these homages were intended doesn’t matter because for me, they only added to the fun.
Aside from Asia, several other Dario Argento regulars pop up in this film. Among them is Udo Kier who plays Padre Johannes, the one priest who opens Sarah Mandy’s eyes to what she is really dealing with, and who she really is. While Udo completely overacts here to the point where you cannot help but laugh a little, he is always a welcome presence in a movie like this. Also in the movie is Daria Nicolodi, Dario’s ex-wife who plays Sarah’s mother who appears in spirit form at various points in the film. While her dialogue comes off as ridiculous at times, she still creates an intriguing presence in a movie that is cheerfully over the top. This is Daria’s first appearance in one of Dario’s movies since “Opera,” and that was almost twenty years ago.
Also on board with Dario is composer Claudio Simonetti, once a famed member of the group Goblin. Goblin has of course created many memorable music scores to Dario’s movies in the past like “Suspiria” (again, one of the all time best) and “Tenebre” among others. Claudio’s work here veers more towards the orchestral more than his electronic scores of the past, although there are electronic elements in the score all the same. Perhaps this film needed more of an orchestral score to illustrate how much more powerful this Third Mother is compared to the other two. It’s a strong score that I am ever so eager to get on CD, assuming that it ever gets released in this lifetime (it’s constantly being delayed).
“The Mother Of Tears” is being shown in a limited release in America from state to state. This is probably being done to anoint the movie with a cult status that it has simply brought on itself. It’s almost shame that American distributors can’t see the audience of movies like “Saw” or “Hostel” flocking to this one, considering that Argento’s older movies have more or less inspired them. But in the end, the biggest audience for this movie will more than likely be found on DVD where it should be loaded with extra features up the wazoo.
For me, the biggest thrill of seeing this movie is that it is the first Dario Argento film that I have ever gotten to see on the big screen. I was never sure if I would ever get the opportunity, but I’m glad I did. Even while the plot doesn’t make a whole lot of sense, and the ending could have been a lot better, I was swept up by the colors and the look of the movie that is the hallmark of all of Dario’s work. He continues to remain a master of horror on a visual level, and I am eager to see what he will do next. “The Mother Of Tears” is not his best movie, but I have a feeling that his most ardent fans will appreciate it more than some of the other movies he has done in the last couple of years.
And like a friend of mine at work in a point also emphasized by Juno herself:
“Dario Argento is the shit!!”
***1/2 out of ****
Welcome to Reviews from the Horror Chamber. I am your chamber keeper, Anthony Thurber. I need to get this off my chest.
Please note: What I’m about to say does not express the view of FilmArcade or its writers.
Will somebody tell me why I’m seeing website ads for Prom Night in late January when the film doesn’t come out until April 11th? I can understand it, if it was Cloverfield, The Dark Knight, or Hellboy 2, but for the remake for Prom Night? Come on, nothing says event movie like the remake of Prom Night! I don’t know why Hollywood needs to hype every other movie. I could understand if it had major stars or a major horror director attached to the project, but come on. I’ve seen the trailer and it doesn’t look that great. Oh, and by the way, it's rated PG-13 for those who care. This film would be lucky if it made 30 million at the box office.
Die And Let Live
Year: 2008
Director: Justin Channell
Stars: Joshua Lively, Zane Crosby, Sarah Bauer, and Ashley Goddard
MPAA Rating: Not Rated
Studio: Heretic Films
Running Time: 75Mins
Review Rating: 4 Stars
Official Website: http://www.iwcfilms.com/dieandletlive/main
Die and Let Live is about a hopeless romantic named Benny who throws a party with the help of his best friend Smalls. The idea behind the party was to woo the girl of his dreams, Stephanie. But that changes when a ferocious infected group of zombies decide to crash his party. Soon the two are fighting for their lives while trying to get away from the deadly virus that infecting people. Trent Hagga and Lloyd Kaufman also make cameos here.
Die and Let Live is one of the funniest horror-comedies that I’ve seen a while. Shaun of the Dead fans will enjoy this. Justin Channell’s direction of this film was very good for the most part. The main reason this succeeds, in my opinion, was the humor. I thought the comedy material in the film was funny. It kept my interest, as the humor wasn’t over the top or lame. The flashbacks scenes were very good and humorous. Channell along with stars Joshua Lively and Zane Crosby succeed in writing the film’s funny dialogue. The horror aspect of it was all right, as all you bloodthirsty zombie fans will no problem with the gore factor. There are no real scares in the film, but it’s not supposed to be a suspenseful and pulse pounding zombie film. If you’re going into it that way then this is not the zombie film for you. The filmmaker also added a very good ska soundtrack to the film. It helped the fact that this wasn’t a serious zombie film and made it enjoyable. The acting in this film is good. The actors did a good job hitting their comedic notes very well and their chemistry was very good.
Die and Let Live is part zombie film, part teen comedy that provides a lot of laughs. Please note: Die and Let Live will be out on DVD this Tuesday.
The Blood Shed
Year: 2007
Director: Alan Rowe Kelly
Stars: Alan Rowe Kelly, Terry M. West, and Joshua Nelson
MPAA Rating: Not Rated
Studio: Heretic Films
Running Time: 75Mins
Review Rating: 3.5 Stars
Official Website: http://www.thebloodshed.net/
The Blood Shed is about a southern psychotic family known as the Bullion family living in North Jersey. This is not your typical average family, as they don’t fit in with the locals. They can’t stand their day-to-day aggravations with the locals. Soon their youngest one (Alan Rowe Kelly (who’s also the director of this film)) is having a birthday party and Papa (Terry M. West (director of Flesh for the Beast and Lord of the G-Strings)) is looking to abducted people in order to please his youngest one for her birthday party. Soon everyone is invited to her party as it becomes out of control when deviant behavior and murder erupts. The film has played in various festivals including It Came From Lake Michigan and Rue Morgue’s Festival of Fear.
The Blood Shed is a surprisingly good and twisted throwback to the exploitation/grindhouse genre. I thought Alan Rowe Kelly did a very good job directing and writing the screenplay for the film. The screenplay does a good job incorporating elements of strange characters that are usually found in John Walter’s movies, as the Bullion clan is one of the most sick and twisted families that I’ve seen, in the horror genre while using the shocking aspects of horror genre and levels of gore very well, Gorehounds won’t be disappointed here. There’s also some dark humor in this film, which was also surprisingly good and well placed in this film. It also helped made the main characters more demented. The actors dug the material in which they were given. They had good chemistry with each other and looked that liked they were having a good time making the film.
The Blood Shed is a shockingly demented horror film that will make you think twice before messing with the Bullion family.
Bikini Bloodbath
Year: 2007
Director: Jon Gorman and Thomas Edward Seymour
Stars: Debbie Rochon, Leah Ford, and Russ Russo
MPAA Rating: Not Rated
Studio: Bloodbath Pictures
Running Time: 73 Mins
Review Rating: 3 Stars
Official Website: http://www.bikinibloodbath.com/
Bikini Bloodbath is the 1st installment of a planned eight part series. The film follows a group of hot gorgeous woman on their last day of high school. The women decide to have a slumber party to celebrate their graduation. Lurking in the shadows is a psychopathic chef (Robert Cosgrove) who’s on a killing spree throughout the town. Soon, he crashes their party, and tries to turn their party into a slaughterhouse.
You got to know that it’s either a fun and cheesy b-movie or awfully bad movie, if in the title sequence it says under Writers/Directors, Who the fuck cares. Thankfully, Bikini Bloodbath was fun to watch. The essentials of plot and character development are non-existent here but at least the film looked like it was made professionally made and not on a home camcorder like Stupid Teenagers Must Die. I thought directors Jon Gorman and Thomas Edward Seymour did a good job with the directing aspects of the film, especially having their actors overact their roles. Usually, it hurts a film but here it works very well, as it contributes to the film’s humor. Their screenplay did a good job spoofing the characters of teen and slasher films, as they made them clueless and laughable, in a good way. The humor of this film was very good, as the filmmakers and actors didn’t take themselves very seriously. At the end of the day, it gives that 80’s cheesy b-movie feel. This film makes me wonder, if the filmmakers were inspired by the Slumber Party Massacre movies of the 1980s?
If you’re looking for plot and character development, see another horror film otherwise if you like hot babes and mindless slasher fun, Bikini Bloodbath is the film for you.
If you’re interested in having your horror film reviewed in the horror chamber, you reach the Chamber Keeper himself at Anthonythurber@filmarcade.net or the head of Film Arcade TonyD@filmarcade.net
That’s it for this week’s edition of Reviews From the Horror Chamber. In next week’s edition, I will be reviewing the Jessica Alba’s latest film, The Eye. Until then, have a frightening week.
